


Like Someone Broken

by ShaneVansen



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, F/M, post-ep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-20
Updated: 2010-03-20
Packaged: 2017-10-08 04:11:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/72557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShaneVansen/pseuds/ShaneVansen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the first time in years, she aches to be held.  <i>The Real World</i> post-ep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like Someone Broken

**Author's Note:**

> Written for LJ's "notjustclosets"' second challenge ("Merry Month of Masturbation"), May 2008.
> 
> I actually wrote this shortly after TRW first aired, but never got around to posting it. Being the lazy type, I cleaned it up a bit and added some more details to fit the challenge, and here we are.
> 
> Many thanks to magnavox_23 for a superspeedy beta.

Elizabeth shifts restlessly in her bed, drawing the blanket closer around her as she attempts to fight off the feeling of isolation. It's been a long day and she should be tired – is, in fact, exhausted – but she just can't relinquish that last bit of lingering fear. For the first time in years, she aches to be held.

Her mind wanders to John, remembering his quiet smile of relief before she gently rebuffed his efforts to make her feel better and sent him on his way. If she turned up at his door right now, Elizabeth knows, he wouldn't turn her away. He would offer as little or as much comfort as she needed and not demand anything more.

It was only earlier today that she realized (admitted, if she's honest with herself) that he's in love with her. After Carson released her, the first thing she did was go visit John in his own isolation tent. He was too relieved to see her awake to temper his emotions in those first few seconds, and she was too tired to deny what she saw. The knowledge is part of her now, is how she knows he wouldn't turn her away, but as screwed up as she feels right now she still knows that it wouldn't be fair to either of them.

That doesn't stop her from wondering, though. She imagines turning up at his room at four in the morning, him holding her, pictures them doing what she's starting to think their relationship is inevitably leading to.

Almost involuntarily her hands begin travelling a familiar path along her body, arousal edging out emptiness as she imagines John there with her. The palm of one hand brushes over her nipples, teasing them to hardened points, while the fingertips of the other run across her chest and stomach, the touch light enough to elicit goosebumps; she closes her eyes and pictures John, lying on his side next to her, leaning over her and watching her intently as her body reacts to his touch.

Elizabeth's fingers move lower, stroking over dark curls on their way to her inner thighs as she sees him leaning down to take a nipple in his mouth. Involuntarily, her back arches into the imagined touch and her legs part further, wanting to feel him there. She runs a single finger through her folds, feeling his calloused skin, hardened from years of weapons training and physical labour and providing exactly the kind of stimulation she needs.

Two fingers slide deep inside without warning, and her mouth opens in a soundless moan. Both hands working in tandem, her exhausted body is quickly brought to the edge and over. She comes silently, but his name echoes like a scream in her head.

Within minutes of her climax the phantom comfort of John disappears, leaving the aching loneliness in his place. Elizabeth curls up on her side, hugging her pillow tightly to her chest and wishing she were strong enough –- or even weak enough -– to just go across the hall. But she isn't, and like all the times before she will make it through this night –- and the next, and the next -– on her own. Only this time, she has the memory of his shy smile and the look in his eyes to ward off the chill, and she lets that image carry her through until morning.

_\--end--_


End file.
